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War-Inducing, Unlucky Barbarian

by Happy | Score: 6100

"WARRRRRRRRR!!!!!" The barbarian announced through his hightech boluga horn. His aircraft engineer, ever the tolerant one, clicked a few buttons on his hand phone which hung from his key chain. Suddenly, the airforce was launched. The barbarian cakled evily. 
"Oh yeah!" he exclaimed as the airplanes desimated everything. He thought a bit. 
"Wait." he said. "Wouldn't it be more ful to destroy them slowly but steadly?" The aircraft engineer thought a bit.
"Kinda," he said. "But you haven't slept in days. Wouldn't be a good idea to destroy things slowly but steadly." One of the unguarded career advisors peeped in. 
"I think it's a good idea," she said. She dragged her pet air conditioner into the dirt field where they stood. 
"Isn't that right Petunia?" She said talking to her pet. "Oh yes it is, yes it is Petunia!" She snuggled with her air conditioner as the engineer and barbarian looked at her weirdly. 
"Uhhh," The barbarian says, "who hires the staff here?" The engineer turned his weird look toward the barbarian.
"Um, you do sir." A sudden ping came from his phone. As he looked at it, his eyes widened in delight and surprise. 
"HOLY MOLY!" He said. "I won the lotery!!" A delivery drivwer suddenly honked his horn from behind them. The barbarian stood like an annoyed statue that looked upon his engineer jeliously. He had also signed up for the lottery. Though his luck was never the best, he had hoped that maybe one day things might change. Apparently not. 
Now that his engineer had won this lottery, he would probably quit and eat some grand breakfast while the barbarian would be stuck with his brummy baliff job and continue to live off of containers of pudding It was horrible how bad his luck was. No one hated it more than he did. Wah. 

Completed challenges

The following challenges were completed during the writing exercise:

Begin Start typing to begin
Event War is declared
Character A tolerant aircraft engineer
Prop Include a key chain
Words Reach 50 words
Letter Use the letter G
Event Your character hasn't slept in days
Words Reach 100 words
Character An unguarded careers advisor
Prop Include an air conditioner
Letter Use the letter P
Words Reach 200 words
Character A positive delivery driver
Event Someone wins the lottery
Prop Include a statuette
Letter Use the letter B
Event Breakfast is served
Character A superficial bailiff
Prop Include a container of pudding
Words Reach 300 words

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